I remember a time when October used to be my favorite time of the year. It was the time of candy, scary movies, pumpkin carving, trick or treating, being with friends and family and enjoying the fall festivities.
But now, I'm just haunted. I'm haunted by the girl I was a few years ago. All the pain and anger and hurt wrapped up into this girl who just couldn't take it anymore and I broke. I had fallen to my lowest point.
I had reached a point in my life where I didn't want to be alive.
Of course I got up, and could only go higher from where I was, and I did, but every time October, November rolls around I can't help but be reminded of that place I was in just a little while ago. I sink to a low place and mope around for a while pitying myself. Oh I have no friends, no one cares about me, I'm so useless in life, i'm so fat.. etc etc.
It's were my mind goes.
Apart of me knows it's dumb, and I can't make it go away, but that's just how hauntings go. It's fitting. Go figure.
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